The Ridiculous Self Pity Thread

Okay, we have complaints and bragging threads why not self pity?

Why, at all?

Well, 13 hrs ago, I was feeling sorry for myself due to losing 4 battles in the Raid Tournaments on Day 2…had lost 1 already on Day 1. So, that’s me done for the tournament.

This made me feel like that SG was punishing me, for reasons only “they” know. RNG was surely against me too, and, also led me to believe that this was no random coincidence that all my boards were :poop:.

During this, I also imagined all the threads with data statistics proving that RNG is indeed Random. The thought of these statistics made my blood pressure levels rise even higher as there is no way that 4 boards in a row is random - which resulted coming to the same result as above that SG are punishing me, for reasons unknown. So, statistics for RNG proof that boards are random is :poop:…so there :grimacing:

Next train of thoughts, please bear in mind that these “thoughts” all happened in the space of a few seconds…and no I don’t have data, or photographical evidence, to back this statement…you’ll just have to “trust” me. Anywho, back on track.

I could fully understand all threads with rage quitting, RNG is not Random, I don’t give a toss about the data analysis or statistical analytics threads.

Now, of course I could have added to these threads or created a thousand more (okay slight exaggeration on the “thousand”) threads repeating how RNG is out to get me, I am CTP and will not become a Whale…because 1) hubby plays the game too and we share same bank account, 2) my son also plays and is nosey asf, 3) because…well, just because.

After all these thoughts, in a matter of seconds, reality settled in, I came out of wallowing in self-pity and was happy farming, raiding and giving our Titan a manicure before it dies.

13hrs later, I wake to find a nature chest waiting to be filled! Ooh yay, I think to myself, I wonder what ascension mat(s) and emblem(s) I will receive!?!

Yeah…excitement deflated and replaced with self pity. This is not random/coincidental…I now have proof that SG is out to get me! What have I done to deserve this, why is it me, why when I buy stuff regularly when hubby and son are not in close vicinity?

I have no self pity now that I’ve “unloaded” and “shared” my views without statistical analytics, blamed SG and RNG.

So, in closing, please use this thread to wallow in self pity with a sensenof humor to boot. If you would like to also share evidential statistics/photographs, please feel free too.

Lets all wallow in self pity together! After all, sharing is caring :heart:

Disclaimer: No smartphones were harmed during the wallowness of self pity making. And I really do love this game and will not be rage quitting. And, and I really do believe that it is random. And, and, and I do know that SG is not punishing me and I thank the Devs and all involved for making an awesome addictive, sometimes frustrating, game :grimacing:


How can you not jump at an opportunity like this!

I too had the worst luck in the past tourney. Typical starting board below (and no purple came, just endless red and yellow - didn’t even manage to charge Ses once)

Elemental chests; you got two unfarmables (ok, it was still pretty crummy and I do understand you’re not happy with it) - I had three elemental chests in a row not giving anything unfarmable, no energy flasks, no gold tokens.

And don’t get me started on the titans! What about twelve in a row with nothing unfarmable? Latest A on 12* had the usual loot

I feel horribly terribly sorry for myself and will indeed ignore that I got five 5* in 30 pulls last Atlantis. Or that my mono purple is basically undefeated in regular raids.

You are right, @MrsBCW; someone/-thing (unidentifiable but malign!) is out to get us. A curse on our boards and chests!


Ok, here’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

5 flags in the Raid tournament today:

First, opponent 4121 me 3595 - won 650
Second, opponent 4214 me 3611 - won 656
Third, opponent 4288 me 3595 - won 661

Wow, the boards are working out really nice here

Fourth, opponent 4236 me 3611 - lost 0
Fifth, opponent 4246 me 3595 - lost 0

What happened? I did not even make a dent in anything in the last two. I mean not even pity points.

Obviously the game decided I had won enough and rigged the boards against me.


Can someone get me a kleenex to wipe my snotty nose as I stamp my feet some more?



We’re obviously such awesome players that SG has had enough of our superiority.

My pity party is currently taking a break so can loan you some :sneezing_face: whilst I put my toys back in my cot :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:


So sorry to hear that SG are out for you too. I have plenty of tinfoil hats and what-not to make you feel like you’re not alone :heart_eyes:


I feel your pain and experience it too.

My story:

When I first started playing, I was lost, no idea what I was doing. Fed my Bane to Sha Ji (ouch) because I only needed 1 healer and 1 yellow on my team, and Sha Ji was a better healer than Sharan and Bane doesn’t heal, so who needs him? :laughing:

Anyway, I was a clueless noob making lots of mistakes and getting raided by level 20s just as I had barely built my second farm. ■■■ is wrong with this game? I thought to myself. This is so unfair.

So I go to global chat to complain about all the unfairness, and what I found there did not help change my opinion of the game. A bunch of toxic narcissists role playing as furries while engaging in simulated coitus with one another. My complaints about the unfairness were met with the traditional “git gud noob” responses that one can usually expect from any type of chat room on any type of multiplayer game. Thanks a lot, jerks, I thought to myself, already at this point contemplating uninstalling this nightmarish monstrosity that I somehow thought was supposed to be “fun”.

Yet through the shadows and toxic sewage dump that is global chat, one voice kept calling to me. Join our alliance, we will teach you the ways of the force, he said. So I took him up on his offer, and he did teach me the ways. Over the next few weeks, I practiced, studied and learned from The Master, and slowly but surely I started to “git gud”. Or at least, less bad.

It was then that I decided to open my wallet. After losing so many raids against level 7s with 5* hero rosters, I convinced myself that the only way to win the game was to get the bestest heroes, and the easiest way to get the bestest heroes was by shelling out money.

Several dollars were spent, and in the end, all I had to show for it was Agwe, Kelile, and a metric crapton of 3* heroes.

Well, at least I got Bane back.



I’ll save the rest of my story for another time, the great saga of failure and self pity that eventually led to redemption. Not a particularly impressive redemption, but redemption nonetheless.


I’ll bite.

I have spent 66% of my money chasing dark heroes.
Heroes I have tried for:

Victor, Kunchen, Kageburado, Aeron, Hel, Mokarr, Sartana, Domitia, Panther, Khiona, Seshat, Bosswolf, Sargasso = about 3200 dollars

Heroes I have gotten:

Bosswolf (spent 100 on fables last June)
Panther (spent 500 across 3 guardians events before I got her)
Khiona (spent 150)
Seshat (spent 150)
Quintus (Never tried for him, got 5 total and eaten 4)

I am doing one more pull today to try for Kage/Seshat2…

Meanwhile the rest of my roster fills out effortlessly. WTFriday?


On the one hand, my first thought is, “holy crap, you got Bosswolf? and Panther? and Khiona and Quintus and Seshat? You lucky………”

On the other hand, $3200??? That’s almost as much as I paid for my first car. And for that, you have my condolences.


It is ridiculous self-pity. I have a lot of really solid heroes.

right now I have more ridiculous whining…

I don’t know which 5* holy I want to upgrade and it vexes me…

Inari2 (my second one from last atlantis, Inari 1 is maxed)
Justice (probably not… but very fast tournaments… well…???)

Right now have Drake, Joon, Inari, Onatel all maxed.

I’d love Poseidon for his synergy with Ariel… but I know I won’t pull him…
And I’m gunning for Kage and Seshat… so I know I won’t get them either.




At the risk of sounding like I’m wealth shaming, that sounds like a real first world problem, like deciding whether to buy a Ferrari or a Lamborghini.

Nah… it’s good for you that you have enough money to spend so much on a game you enjoy. I would probably do the same if my bank balance had a couple more zeroes behind it.

Good luck with whatever you decide, and please take mercy on me and my discount store heroes if you ever have the opportunity to raid me. :grin:


In fairness, I spend a great deal less than I used to. Admittedly, I got a bit carried away. It’s easy to do.

But yes, I did spend a bit to get to this point. Playing since October 2017, so the dollars are a bit more spread out.

Absolutely hilarious and I cannot wait for the saga to continue! I inhaled half a cup of tea; that story had @JonahTheBard - quality.

I did all those mistakes too starting. Actually found this forum when looking for an EXPLANATION to what I percieved as the most unfair and upsetting treatment from the game (had just discovered that magic orbs could not be farmed and Leo, having eaten half my roster including Wu who I decided was the worst of them all - chance to MISS?? - craved them).


Still more than I’ll probably end up spending in the entire life of this game. But I still manage to have fun and get a few decent heroes here and there. Picked up a Kashrek from the bargain bin a couple months ago, 50% off. He’s missing a tooth and part of his tail, but still gets the job done. :+1:


I started a free account in addition to test out whether I really know what I’m doing or just bolstered by nice heroes.

That account has two Gaderius and one Anzogh. Just pulled Ameonna from tokens today. Doing well enough. it’s interesting to play with limited heroes, that’s for sure.


I’m c2p, my girlfriend is even cheaper, yet she pulls 4* and 5* heroes on a regular basis. It’s not just $$$. Yes the money will give you more chances of pulling a great hero, but it still comes down to RNG in the end.


Thank you for the compliment :grin:

I’m actually half afraid to continue my story, as sequels are rarely as good as the original. I was going to wait for my muse to awaken from her mid-morning nap before continuing, but it appears as though she has consumed a few too many mugs of mead and may not regain consciousness for several hours. So I will attempt to continue my pathetic tale without her inspiration.

Part 2

Now, here I was, part of a grand Alliance. I had purchased a VIP package which allowed me to upgrade my village at a much faster rate. My crops were blooming beautifully, my villagers smiled and waved at me. I had a new pet dragon who sat perched atop my beautiful castle, bestowing me with a bounty of gems on a daily basis. Times were good.

My alliance leader was a man of great wisdom but few words. I was excited when I pulled Hawkmoon for the first time. “Master, I finally have a 3* healer! Now I can get rid of Sha Ji,” I exclaimed with glee. “Good,” he replied. “Now hit the titan.”

When I reached level 12, I was told that I was now eligible to participate in wars. I was nervous, I had never participated in wars before. How did it all work? I did the tutorial and set up a defense team, the best of whatever I had at the moment. “It’s like raids,” a fellow soldier told me, “but with all of us against all of them.” Okay, I thought to myself. Now I’m going to have to do raids… but my results are going to be open for all the alliance to see. If I do poorly, they’ll all laugh at me, I thought to myself. “Just do your best,” the leader told me. “And use all your flags. You need 30 heroes.”

30 heroes??? Was he insane? I didn’t have 30 heroes. “Why do I need 30 heroes?” I asked. “You get 6 flags. You can only use each hero once.” I spent the next 24 hours of the preparation phase frantically collecting every Brogan, Layla, Needler, Sharan, Sha Ji, etc. that I could muster from my TCs. The next day, I went into the war. I used my first 3 flags. I was informed that I wouldn’t get the next 3 until the halfway point. I spent the next 12 hours leveling up my remaining heroes as high as I could. I think I scored 12 points in the entire war.

“I’m sorry,” I told my leader after the war was over. “Why are you sorry?” he asked. “Because I only got 12 points.”

“It was your first war. You used all of your flags. You have nothing to apologize for,” he assured me. “Keep leveling your teams, you will get better.” And then he logged off.

It took several wars before I got better. I leveled up a virtual army of Laylas and Raghnilds and Needlers and whatever else I could get my hands on. Meanwhile, my teammates were pulling Aegirs and Rigards and Vivicas left and right. My team was pathetic by comparison. I had one of the lowest TP defense teams on the board.

“TGW,” the leader addressed me before the next war. “Yes?” I replied. “Your Isshtak,” he said. “What about him?” I asked. “His special isn’t maxed,” he pointed out the obvious. I had managed to get Issh to 3/50, but his special was still stuck at 6. “I know, I’m trying, but I have all these other greens I’m trying to level,” I explained. “Issh is good, but only when his special is maxed,” he said. Then he logged off.

Here I was leveling all of my lower teams, while neglecting my main team and allowing everyone else to pass me. Players who joined the alliance at the same time as me now had 4* and 5* heroes, every war their defense teams seemed to leave me further and further in the dust. I didn’t understand, I was playing every day, constantly leveling up my teams. Was I doing it wrong?

Then came the day of the war. During the preparation, the leader addressed us. “Be careful,” he said. “This team uses curved swords,” he explained. “Um… what?” I asked, to which he replied, “curved… swords.” He then explained that he used to be an adventurer like me until he took an arrow to the knee.

Okay, so that didn’t happen. What actually happened is that we went into the war. As usual, my high flying teammates got great hits early on, putting our score up high initially. Then the second half came and our scores started to wane, and the opponent got the upper hand. Many on our team didn’t even use all of their flags. “I can’t possibly take out that team with these junk heroes I have left,” they huffed before logging off. One by one, my allies used their last flags for 1 or 0 points, or didn’t use them at all, until I was the only one left.

We weren’t that far behind. No one was left to help me, but I wasn’t about to give up. I have to try, I told myself. So I gathered up all my Laylas and Sha Jis and Brogans and Needlers, Raghnilds and Olafs and Shaarkots and Jennehs, all the Farids and Zudaks and Jennehs, and all the Juliuses and Hous in Houville, and I told them all:

" I’m not going to lie to you, it looks pretty bad. We’re probably going to lose. Most of you are going to die today. But, you will die with honor. The odds are stacked against us, but we cannot give up. Today is the day of reckoning. Today is the day when we find out what we’re made of. Would you rather live as slaves, or die as free men? When you meet your maker, do you want to tell him that you died a coward’s death, or the death of a hero, fighting until your last breath, one who is worthy of holding an eternal place in the halls of Valhalla? I for one, am not going to surrender! And neither will any of you! If you have any ounce of courage in you, now is the time to stand up for what you believe in! Now is the time to take the fight to our enemies! To show them what we’re made of! Never give up, never surrender! This… is… SPARTA!!!"

On that day, a thousand 2* heroes rushed the battlefield, donning wooden swords and tattered leather armor, and they felled a hundred of the enemy’s elite plate armored warriors and battlemages, barely squeaking out a victory for the underpowered team in the final minutes of the battle.

And on that day, the underdog alliance celebrated victory, and I was carried through the glorious halls of our guild as all of my teammates cheered, “TGW! TGW! TGW!”

Okay so that last part didn’t happen. But I did get promoted to elder, and from that day forward I came to be known as the 2* hero. :grin:


I love how this morphed into the ridiculous epic thread :rofl:


Oh @TGW thank you for an amusing account of your self-pitiness! Looove your story telling, just like @JonahTheBard - a bit of competition has never hurt anyone :grimacing:

I recall when I completed Province 13, I thought to myself, “I have some 4s levelled why do I need my maxed 3s (Azar, Tyrum, Berden, Bane, Karil?” So, I ate them all. I also ate Vivica, Peters…yes an event hero from the very first CE I ever participated in.

Bear in mind, I was in an alliance with half who’d been last active 200+ days. It wasn’t until a fellow member said, “this leader sucks he hasn’t been on for so long, someone should create a new alliance!”

Long story short I created a new one and learnt alot from Active Players.

Thank you again for sharing!


432 pulls - 0 Kages. Smh


It took me 6mths to “find” this forum, then actually participate in a thread!

Thank goodness for myriad of information that is here!


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