The Ridiculous POLL thread

Write-in / suggested options are very welcome, if you have any :smile:

  • Master Lepus is not last level because Event was extended and he was too easy to beat by a 4600 Team
  • P2W players were bored, so all normal players cannot end event anymore now
  • Making more and difficult levels will bring more cash for SG

0 voters

1 Like

Sorry, not ridiculous enough.

1 Like

What is it with Richard and his “Is Jotunheim the Land of Free Hugs” remark?

  • He’s up to date on his vaccinations, duh. Renewed every 3 years!
  • It’s the culture he’s from! That’s why he gives 3 cheek-kisses to every new hero you summon or train!
  • His parents raised him to believe that physical contact was sissy stuff, and now he’s desperately trying to reclaim his lost childhood!
  • He’s just naturally dense. Too many hammers to the head. Why do you think Vivica and Elena always babysit him?
  • He forgot to attend the Cultural Awareness training session before jumping into the portal. Oohhhh, he’s gonna get it from HR! They’re gonna write to his manager!
  • He can hug me any time. Preferably in his Barbarian costume. And he doesn’t need to shave :wink:
  • Stop laughing! If you understood the way he felt, you would want a hug too! OMG I’m screaming at my cat as I type this, someone please come over and we can talk through the window… I’ll slip you cookies through the mail slot… please…
  • New special skill idea: Free Hug! Enemies get -200% attack, +500 max health, do nothing for 5 turns, and when mana is full they cast DEFECT and join your side! Yeah!

0 voters

2 Likes

What compensation should be given to Vela/Telluria owners if they are (over)nerfed (and please just vote without comments, I would like to keep this section clean, and hopefully funny):

  • Free 5* of your choice
  • Exchange of Tella/Vella for 5* at same level of your choice
  • Set of ascension materials
  • Pack of Titan Flasks
  • Pack of Energy Flasks
  • You were expecting pack of Raid Flasks, but it was me, Dio! (so, Dio, a new 5* hero!)
  • Fully ascended and emblemed Aife
  • Nothing
  • Formal apology
  • Spanish Inquisition
  • Buffed Atomos
  • NOOOOTHHIIIIIIINNG! (different from just ‘Nothing’, said with more metal voice)
  • A plushie of Porg (hey! I would take that!)
  • Free Lightsaber
  • World Peace
  • A balance of the Universe

0 voters

1 Like

So, what’s up with the planned “rebalancing” (read: nerf) of the Titanium Shield?

  • Titans are being overhunted. We need to step up conservation efforts!
  • Those poor 1* cannon fodder heroes were tired of being used like that! They demand respect!
  • It’s a way to make the rest of the Hunter’s Lodge items seem a little bit less useless!
  • Have you ever actually held a titanium shield? Those things are heavy! Heroes everywhere have been complaining about it!
  • Please oh please oh please don’t let this turn into yet another compensation thread…

0 voters

4 Likes

Rather than creating a whole new thread just to propose a purely hypothetical situation, I haz decided to bring this one back from the dead instead.

If/when I finally decide to depart the forum for good, how should I do it?

  • In traditional TGW fashion: by posting an angry TL;DR rant about everything I think is wrong with the game
  • In traditional TGW fashion: by posting an absurdly long meme making fun of everything that I think is wrong with the game
  • In somewhat TGW fashion: thank the community whilst giving SG the bird, drop the mic with a final “Peace! TGW out!”
  • In non-traditional TGW fashion: be very polite, thank SG for everything they’ve done for us (???); or in other words, lie my ■■■ off
  • In VERY non-traditional TGW fashion: just stop posting altogether without saying anything

0 voters

DISCLAIMER: I don’t have any definitive plans to permanently leave the forum at this point, but the possibility has begun to enter my mind… and should that day come, I want to make sure that I do it in the best possible way.

5 Likes

So, why were Alby and Seshat not Tavern of Legends bosses, despite having speaking parts in the cutscenes?

  • Seshat was mad at Alby for forgetting she can generate minions! She smacked him on the head real good!
  • Well duh, Gravemaker knocked both of them out! He’s so OP even other HOTMs don’t stand a chance!
  • Well, I for one am glad they weren’t bosses. Seshat and Alby are the prizes of my roster, I wouldn’t want to beat them up!
  • If you analyze who actually appeared, you’ll see the devs tried really hard to bring a balance: a dispeller, a cleanser, a minion summoner, a sniper, a fast hitter, a DoTer. Learn to look and think before you post, noob!
  • I don’t care, I’m still mad Seshat wasn’t included in the summon portal, and will conveniently ignore both the terribly low summoning odds AND all the posts explaining that Seshat is too new to be available, I’m just mad dang it!
  • I don’t know and I don’t care, I’m just gonna post here to brag about summoning Myztero. Yeah sure I spent my life’s savings, and I have absolutely no use for him on my roster, but I just wanna brag.
  • I gave feedback about that in beta, but they didn’t listen. As usual.
  • This is terrible of SG, clearly they nerfed the bosses. I demand compensation!

0 voters

4 Likes

Secret ingredient in Kiril’s blessed brew?

  • Water, barley, yeast, hops… and lots of passion and love.
  • So Peachykeen did a fanfic about that, and you absolutely do NOT want to know
  • It’s a dwarf thing. If I told you, I’d have to kill you.
  • It’s a dwarf thing. The secret clue? Watch Lord of the Rings and stop at minute 66.66. Then, take the first bit of dialogue from Gimli. Now, watch Snow White and the Seven Dwarves minute 47.84 and take the second word that Dopey says. Then find that page in the dictionary, take the seventh word on that page, and travel to the town named after that page, then… hey, hey, come back, I promise it’s worth it at the end!
  • The tears of all the players who spent money and still didn’t summon an HOTM in Tavern of Legends.
  • The tears of all the players mourning Hero Academy…

0 voters

Shout out to @PeachyKeen (fanfic here , read at your own risk !)

4 Likes

glad you’re not definitively planning to leave… and I have every confidence if you do, you will do it in the best possible way even without this poll :slight_smile: @TGW

3 Likes

Which title is most deserving of me?

  • Discobot’s Lover
  • High-Fiver
  • Repungant
  • Who the F are you?

0 voters

2 Likes

What’s Chef Boldtusk gonna cook up tonight??

  • King Serpent Pie. Why else did we hunt so many of those darned things, for nothing more than an avatar and bragging rights?
  • Just a salad and a smoothie, thank you. Gotta burn all those corona-kilos.
  • Nothing; he whacked one too many Dark Elves on the head with his frying pan and busted it all up.
  • Conspiracy theories about how boards are all rigged… oh wait, we can just order takeout from the forums.

0 voters

1 Like

For the love of Alfrike: Are you Team Ymir or Team Fenrir?

  • Team Ymir! Look at how badly Alfrike is trying to get revenge! Poor thing must be heartbroken.
  • Team Fenrir! I mean, he’s the Nice Guy who was a loyal friend and never tried to bust up their marriage!
  • How could you even consider Fenrir? Are you secretly a furry? That defies the laws of nature, never mind that Ymir and Alfrike are elves and this whole game is set in a fictional universe!
  • Let Alfrike have both of them, some cultures allow a man to have multiple wives, why not allow a woman to have multiple husbands?!?!?!?
  • I couldn’t care less, as long as I can summon them. Instead of asking this stupid question, we should be madly speculating about Ymir’s special skill!
  • Both Ymir and Fenrir have horrible taste in women. Now Freya, now that’s an S3 Purple hero…
  • I don’t care, as long as SG doesn’t rebalance any of them.

0 voters

1 Like

I like the way you did that one! The “Pie” is a great way to show it!

2 Likes

More like:

What’s Chef Boldtusk gonna cook up tonight??

  • Nothing, @akionna stole his frying pan.

0 voters

2 Likes
Why are the Unstable Spruces so unstable?
  • They live in a society that doesn’t promote mental health awareness, and they never learned to ask for help
  • The self-isolation from COVID made them snap
  • Santa said he wouldn’t give them presents this year! How could he?!?!
  • How DARE Small Giant make a new hero based on the snowmen, but not on the spruces??? They’ve been here as long as the snowmen have!
  • It’s all the uncertainty! They never know who’s going to get nerfed next! Why pull for an HOTM if it will get nerfed in a few months?!
  • They said they would quit the game if their 30-pull didn’t give them at least one 5* this time… and it didn’t. Then they started feeding their 5*s to Aife… and something just snapped in them.
  • They wanted to make a ridiculous poll and couldn’t stop thinking of choices, and now they ended up with a 100-choice poll and SOMEONE HELP ME I CAN’T STOP

0 voters

1 Like

So why did Kadilen and Elkanen end up as bosses in Valhalla???

  • They were tired of being in Lianna’s shadow! At least in Valhalla they only have to compete… with… Heimdall… um…
  • They are waiting for a chance to murder Elena, Vivica and Richard so that they can be the stars of Season 1!
  • With the worsening economic situation back home, they went where they could get better opportunities as Alfrike’s lackeys!
  • They were tired of the discrimination from the humans, dwarves, werewolves, pandas, monkeys and undead and went where they felt more welcome!
  • Small Giant got lazy and tired of making new boss designs, and figured if mobs like Khiona and Aegir could become HOTMs, then vanilla heroes could become bosses!
  • These aren’t OUR Kadi and Elky, they are their evil cousins from Valhalla, duh!
  • I don’t care why, can we please kick them out of the Valhalla summon portal already?!

0 voters

3 Likes

So, bets on how the storyline of Season 4 will end?

Warning: potential spoilers

  • Ursena gets resurrected and proceeds to blast Moreau for hurting Elizabeth. Ursena can sympathize, cause Poseidon did that to her once! Ursena and Xnolphod then elope and go on honeymoon to Valhalla!
  • Moreau calls forth the Demiurge, who promptly squishes Moreau for ruining its nap. Tough luck, Moreau.
  • Elziabeth’s fiends avenge their mistress, and Underwild is flooded with spiders! Ewww!
  • Passepartout’s weird flashlight thingie is revealed to be The Most Powerful Weapon in the Universe, and smashes Moreau into space.
  • SG/Zynga implement a choose-your-own-ending scenario, with 3 branching plots and… hahahaha, sorry, I couldn’t finish as it sounded so ridiculous while I was typing…
  • Nobody knows, because SG/Zynga will make the final boss so difficult that even after 100000 continues, nobody can beat it, and everybody gives up, because (insert 3-page rant about how corporations are evil, and we as consumers need to stop being sheep)
  • Treevil shows up and whacks everybody. Treevil forever!

0 voters

4 Likes

I honestly can’t tell. I stopped paying attention when Captain Nemo stole pipes from Darth Vader, and Frodo Baggins sent flowers to Jan Eyre, who turned out to be Darth Vader’s girfriend, which made the lizard men very mad. I have no recollection of the particulars, but I remember it did make perfect sense and wasn’t ridiculous at all. Just a riveting, beautiful piece of writing.

2 Likes

The Demiurge summoned by Morel then:

  • Summoned Hemiurge and they went drag racing
  • Summoned Semiurge and they went trucking
  • Summoned Urge and succumbed to his most basic
  • Summoned HemiSemiDemiurge and put Yingwe Malmsteen to shame
  • Had a tea party

0 voters

PS I missed this thread …

4 Likes