You’re absolutely right. You are. I would offer to let you flog me, but what if I found out I enjoyed it?
Then we would have to have THAT TALK.
Let’s play that out for a tick:
Witch: “Duaneski, you’ve been a naughty girl and you have to pay. I am gonna flog you, but it’s for your own good.”
Me: “I understand. It’s harsh, but fair.”
flogging commences
Duaneski… doesn’t hate it
Witch: “I hope you learned your lesson.”
Me: “uhhhh… you know… I actually was thinking about adding in some stuff about the United Preschoolers Guild and how they’re whooping down 4* tita… AH WHO CARES JUST KEEP GOING THIS FEELS SO GOOD!!”
Witch:
(Readers imagining me being tied up and flogged, then enjoying it should generate some new complaints. Ridiculous ones? Maybe not. But I imagine psychiatry revenue globally is about to swing upwards 
)