The Ridiculous Complaints thread

Getting divorced gonna cost you some bank bro. Sounds like SG got this one right.

You probably should have to pay like, 500 gems a month in addition to the up front fee, too, though.

So maybe the cost isn’t enough, and I should complain about that? But I’m still too much in shock at Garanwyn’s moderatorial betrayal to register a ridiculous complaint currently


The boards aren’t random or fair, they’re rigged!

It’s a conspiracy!

And even worse, just when you FINALLY start getting everyone to believe that, the Developers track you down from the forum and tag your account and give you a good board just to make you look crazy!

I DEMAND my consistently bad boards, stop messing with me!


What kind of animal would sign off on a good board like that?

The SG mission statement specifically (aledgedly) states the company pillars of:

“Greed. Unfairness. Lack of caring about customer.”

Giving you that board goes against everything they stand for. Unless there’s some sort of Boiler Room bust about to happen that someone on the inside wants to give out a win before the whole thing comes tumbling down by the Feds, I otherwise have to assume that is a v18.1 glitch, and will (hopefully) soon be corrected.

(Using a fake name for fear of backlash from the devs in the real world)


Why is it @garanwyn comes up with such insightful and thoughtful ridiculous complaints? He makes my pithy attempts here seem … well … pithy.

Also he keep stealing all my likes.


There is a large problem of misrepresentation of odds on the forum. While it is nice that @Kerridoc drops by once in a while to remind players of the summon odds, the summon threads tend to report more favorable pulls and omit more realistic/disappointing pulls.

I propose that instead of Kerridoc posting the summon odds once, that he post a proportional number of times to show the true odds of the event. Someone got Onatel off a single token? He posts the odds 76 times consecutively to bring the odds back in line to published quantities. Pulled Kageburado AND Onatel from a single pull? Here comes a train of 1/(.013*.013) -1 = 5916 more posts by our fearless odds-balancer/part-time banana-coconut shampoo model!

If SG can spam my roster with Renfelds and Friar Tucks, I don’t think it is a problem to spam the posts about odds on summon threads :wink: .


So @LadySuzanne… would you rather be the "pot’ or the “kettle” here?

In my case, SG bribed me outrageously for my good behavior. At least, I think that’s the explanation for the 15 Gatos I just pulled from the Atlantis gate this morning. I mean, no one from SG actually contacted me or anything. But with crazy good loot like that, what else could it be?

So what’s your excuse? :face_with_monocle:


Would you believe I’m just a super sweet, kind and wonderful person? :angel:

No? Eh, well, you’re probably safe then. :grimacing:

Your SG payoff theory would support my 14 duplicate feeders I received as ‘payment’ from Atlantis this morning. SG is a kind, thoughtful overlord… errr… business as they knew my santa needed to gain weight. Lol


I want to complain about the fact that I have increasingly less to complain about.

  1. I really like the game’s new features
  2. SG is ironing out many of the game’s issues
  3. And when they get it wrong, they give us compensation
  4. The AW match ups are increasingly better
  5. When they aren’t, I can often see why
  6. My alliance is growing and I like all of the members
  7. I have a good stable of heroes, and I’m enjoying levelling them up
  8. The summons gates have been kind to me lately
  9. New events are coming up, making the game even more interesting

All in all, I have much less to be angry about…

…and that makes me ANGRY!

SG - it is wrong that you are mostly getting it right! I demand a return to the heady days of cursing, thumping the desk in frustration, and flinging my tablet across the room.


:grin: :grin: :grin:

20 cats wearing tinfoil fedoras


Pics or it didn’t happen!!!
You do not tell me you have seen them. :unamused:

I have been searching for those about 12 years now…



20 cats saying “I told you so” :grin:


I’ll buy ten !

20 Zimkitties

I got a new complain…we all got our own caste and play in different alliances.
So WHY have we all the same Emblem above our gates???

I want my OWN!


Uh oh. You’ve crossed the boundary from Ridiculous to real post in #ideas-feature-requests


Darn! OK. I herewith re-call my complain and complain that I have nothing to complain atm!!
The box is full anyway…



20 complaints about :heart: limits


I want to complain that this is real barbarian speak! It must hold true to E&P because it does in other rpg type table top games…


This one hit home as an almost legit complaint because I changed my name and wasted 200gems on a new BG right after divorcing my old alliance.—so on the off chance we’re ever war matched together they won’t recognize me as the person who deserted them.

What if shiz hits the fan in my new alliance some day and I have to divorce them to? :disappointed_relieved:


Pre-nup… only way to go here. If you didn’t get one before joining your new alliance, I suggest you trick them into signing one soon. Perhaps side it into chat disguised as war prep documentation? Might have to get creative :wink:


A further complaint about that bit of dialog—-

Nashgar is holding an axe. Axes are not crushing weapons, but slashing weapons. Sheesh. Doesn’t anyone in Finland have a D&D manual?

Boril crush:

Nashgar chop.


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