The Ridiculous Complaints thread

Sorry, empire warrior Hu-Tao has complained that he and his sons would grow sickly if they didnt get most of the empires leafy greens and combined they need about 100lbs a day.

As for our stock supply of fruit…we’ll Wu Kong calls dibs…on literally all of it. We could try to stop him but he has a bit of a temper. If he gets angry enough to quit his job as a warrior it would be catastrophic because Titans would over run and destroy the empire. So we must do what is necessary to keep him happy

We need to guarantee the that recruits are free of disease and illness before they are ground into ham. The antibiotics greatly insure optimal human health along with msg free diet. Rest assured health of the recruits is top priority so no diseases are passed a long to the heroes after consumption. If allergy to antibiotics is a concern please know we make sure to quarantine the recruits for 24 hours after their last dose and the additional 6 hours before they are put in the slaughter house to ensure all of the medication is eliminated from the body. Grapefruits are forbidden in the empire to prevent recruits from accidentally extending antibotic elimination time.

On the bright side, sleep easy knowing the water supply is pure and free of antibiotics, arsenic, and microplastics.

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Meh. Vegetarians are the biggest murderers out there. Pulling limbs off, chopping heads off and yarding the poor vegtables put of the ground. Poir things have no xhance of escape. Murdering b******s…

What i have discovered reveals and answer so much questions.

So please do think wisely before reading the next Part what SG has hide from us, it is not for everybody health reading such disgusting informations about what happend.

Revealing the following question and that they are connected to each other.

1.What really happens when you level up a hero?
2.Whats behind the castle?
3.Why is there a river floating in the abyss?

1.SG describes it as that the hero and troops are retiring… What really happens is… Sorry guys the Hero… DIES!!! No s*** guys they DIE!!!

2.so that leads to what is behind the castle that noone can see… THE DEAD CORPSES OF THEM!!! Never wondered what the house dragon is eating all the time?.. YES you can guess it. But that little dragon can’t eat that much.

3.That leads us to the last mystery. The river transports the dead bodies into the abyss. One day i logged in i saw a corpse went down, i swear.

I beg SG to tell the truth. Please give a statement right here!

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I know we point out a lot things that needs correcting with the game, but after listening to our, “Peace! Not War!” protests, I’m really impressed with the developer’s decision to cancel the war! It’s nice to see that they do listen to us!

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ROFL! When hubby first told me about the game, I looked at him and said ‘You eat other heroes? What kind of sick game is that!?’.

As a true E&P addict now, I have learned to ignore how my heroes get leveled up :rofl:

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Why are there no bigger women heroes? How does Boldtusk’s, Gormek’s, & the blue dwarves reproduce? I have no imagination for fan-fiction. Show me the ladies of girth.

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In Maine we call them “women of substance”. :wink:

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“she has huge… tracts of land…”

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I want to complain about our mods.
I have been opening I think 2 dozen posts about the war and you know what? They close all of them without a reply!
Don’t you guys have something better to do with your free time?
I mean, you read everything that is being posted here or even do some fun things outside in the sun?

gonna go open a new thread and hope I get a reply and they do not close it again

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Could also run a competition alongside on how many posts we can gets flagged

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Province 10 Stage 3 two words: Ghost Areola.

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I’ve recently received a complaint from the foreman of stronghold maintenance. Several workers have filed for medical leave after straining their backs moving the 4m pumpkins into place from the dragon-derrick. He is also wondering how I plan to remove this monstrosity from the turret. The Health and Safety Committee have ruled out tipping it over the edge, and it’s far too large to fit through the door.
image

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Urgh…man I got cramp from shifting all your threads.

It was like crazy forum whack-a-mole :yum:

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and we appreciate the effort …otherwise we would have a zillion war threads hiding all the other critical threads like this one.

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:astonished: The kitchen staff has threatened to quit of anyone even thinks about pumpkin pie or roasted pumpkin seeds or pumpkin spice anything. :scream:

so that leads to what is behind the castle that noone can see… THE DEAD CORPSES OF THEM!!!

To be specific its just partial skeletons.

All edible fat/muscle is seperated first to be cooked into hams so the the heroes can feast and get stronger.

Then the blood is drained so the posh vampire heroes can use it as bases for their cocktails.

Then the brains are carefully removed and chopped so Silthus, Sabina and Cyprian can have snacks with their sunday morning tea.

The remaining organs are fed to the baby dragon as snacks and simply the skeletons are stored behind the castle…so you know not nearly as eerie

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Why does Ragnhild carry around sheaths that her swords are 14inches too wide to ever fit into?

Is she stupid or does she do it for the “fashion” of sheaths?

Speaking of fashion… Sartana is dead. You cant walk quickly in 6” skinny heel, 3” front platform stilettos let a lone fight in them. Sartana is dead, not from getting killed in battle but from running to quickly in her ridiculous ■■■ heels, twisting her ankle 180 degrees, and smashing her skull open on the concrete

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If there’s a commuter train to catch, you’d be surprised at how quickly one can run in stilettos.

(Not me, for the record. I’m a big fan of wearing commuter loafers and packing the heels because I have the grace and luck of someone who should wear sensible shoes. But I’ve seen women run down a taxi during prime time in those suckers, to the chagrin of businessmen who were too slow…

I’m just saying, pretty sure Sartana handles ‘em like the boss she is.)

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Sartana fights in stilettos, but Elkanen fights with a broken spine! Physics and anatomy never stopped fantasy ladies to win a fight!

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Elkanen? He looks okay to me…