Good morning, afternoon and evening Forum Fans
Friday’s interview features legendary data Miner @BarryWuzHere
Today’s installment features wonder wordsmith @akionna.
Remember to #PlayApartTogether
If you missed them, you can find previous interviews below:
how long have you been playing? 
Over two years probably. I never created an actual profile to log on. The game just magically installed itself. Somehow.
what’s your current role in your alliance? 
I’m a nobody on my alliance. Though I only just joined one less than six months ago. Ok, maybe I like to welcome new members. I also scared them away during Path of Valor. So now we have a “Wait 24 hours before welcoming anyone” rule.
I forgot. Our esteemed leader must have accidentally promoted me to Elder. That “Kick” button terrifies me. My kid is always saying, " What happens if I push it?"
which hero are you currently levelling and how will you use them? 
Just got our first HOTM Telluria. On a bonus roll no less. I always thought it was a myth. Everytime I did a summon, I never got a bonus roll. Of course, I would yell with envy, “What about me? Where’s my bonus roll?”
So last time, too tired to care (after scouring all supermarkets for non-existent toilet paper)–
I let the kid do a Valhalla summon with those questionable looking coins. He pulled Bjorn.
Yay.
Then 1.2 seconds later Telluria popped up.
The lesson here–
RNG is sensitive folks. Don’t make any demands, and she will surprise you. She might even reward you.
Telluria is almost 4.80. I will try her at tank soon.
Which Season 1 hero would you most recommend to a new player? 
Kiril was my first maxed 4-star. Then Melendor. I am partial to healers though. Emblem those healers!
What can you see out of your window right now? 
I see lots of trees in the backyard. It’s really a fruit orchard back there. Lots of birds visit. They are unaffected by this virus apparently.
If @petri was coming to dinner, what would you cook? 
Petri is getting fried rice with leftover veggies and whatever protein I find.
Just to be clear, some grandmas nearly ran me over with their shopping carts heading for the rice aisle. I got a bag of rice, but I’m never competing against them again. They got speed, and they got nothing to lose.
If you could make two changes to the game, one realistic and one less so, what would they be? 
Two changes … Would love to direct message someone in our alliance. That’s unrealistic right?
Would also love to see a player rewarded on their anniversary:
If I gave you $1000 to spend frivolously, what would you buy? 
Buy books maybe. Our libraries shut down, so need the kids reading … instead of binging Netflix and Nickelodeon.
Love that story about your kid summoning you Telluria. And fast grandmas… yikes!
and I also love fried rice with veggies and whatever protein… that makes every fried rice dish a completely new one, so many possible combinations! two thumbs up! @akionna
This may be my favorite answers yet!! Thank you @akionna for making me laugh so early In the morning. I normally only grunt before I’ve had my coffee.
Plus your supermarket adventures touch a nerve with me…
Having the old lady tapping my on the leg with her cane telling me that last pack of TP was hers and she had just put it down for a minute. Of course being the gentleman I am I said, “OH, pardon me ma’am I’m so sorry! Here you go” and tossing it over the shelves to the next isle. Neither of us ever saw that TP again, and somewhere someone think Jesus answered their prayers.
@JonahTheBard Great idea and project, thanks a lot! Love getting to know more about some of the forum-people 
Keep it up 
@akionna, congratulations on Telluria! She seems fabulous. Certainly at tank she has really been confounding me for the past month.
I am embarrassed to say that I am not familiar with your work. Would you care to link me to a few contributions that you look at as your highlights? I’d enjoy reading it, especially since Jonah endorses you!
@akionna has been a prolific contributor to our communal tale, she and @sleepyhead in particular have been tag-teaming to hilarious effect
Akionna is a master writer! I check the thread every day to see what she comes up with. I credit her for shifting the story to adding solid personalities and quirks to many heroes, and every time I use those heroes I imagine them acting the way she writes them.
Her Hu Tao, in particular, is hilarious. She’s written some amazing scenes poking fun at his slow mana, by making him just act so darned slow and thoughtful.
Thank you for reading @Math4lyfe!
I admit, I was startled when the Bard Himself pinged me. Because thus far, most of my forum posts have been quite irrelevant:
Then I realized, “Oh, he must be talking about the Man Flu thread.” Because … I maybe refused to let the thread die …
… and maybe (consistently) broke his ONLY rule of “Write the next line.”
… and maybe wrote the NEXT PAGE … Accidentally.
You had me at hello…
Hello dear @sleepyhead, my Esteemed Writing Partner!
My kid has serious summoning skills. When we first started the game, he said, “We need a Holy hero. Let’s do the Elemental Summon.”
Me, stuttering, “But, we only have 300 gems!”
Him, “That’s perfect! Ready?”
Me (closing my eyes), “I’m not!”
Him, shaking his head. “I’m doing it.”
Three seconds later … JOON popped out.
And he won with, “See, I used positive thoughts!”
Ok seriously @PapaHeavy, I’m still laughing at your Flying Toilet Paper. That must have hit someone in the next aisle over.
Except, I would totally take that as a Heavenly Sign, that indeed …
I do deserve the most rare 4-star Paper Ascension Mat.
No need to embarrassed @IvyTheTerrible! I typically try to stay out of trouble, but The Bard Himself might have noticed me posting to his Man Flu Thread …
But really, that’s his fault because he STARTED it.
I’m also too lazy to do anything remotely useful like track data and update spreadsheets. I might have accidentally spent almost 20 years in Silicon Valley writing every kind of technical document imaginable … from guides to specs to manuals … and yes, even release updates for builds.
Which means, I’m in direct rebellion of all my training, and I writing for fun now.
Where before I killed you with boredom, educating you with technical details, now I strive NOT to kill you at all. Hopefully you would want to read the next sentence.
PS: I have read your posts. And you are thoughtful and diplomatic … and incredibly detailed with your replies. So thank you for that.
Great to get to know you @akionna
I need to start reading/contributing to the forum story…from everything I hear it’s a jolly good time (and I’ll cheat and use it towards my daily 2000 words of writing goal).
Congrats on Telluria on the bonus draw!
@JonahTheBard hope you’re not getting too aggressive with how frequently you conduct these interviews, don’t want you getting burned out.
Thank you @sleepyhead for the compliment! I so enjoy writing with you! You’re pretty awesome yourself.
Also … OMG … the stuff you come up with. I had to look up Ice and Zatanna!
Last night, me, yelling from the dining table, “What universe is Wonder Woman from?” Four seconds later, “What about Wolverine?” Then, “What about Aquaman?”
The kid would answer, “DC … Marvel … DC … Come on! Can’t you remember anything?”
No fear, Voiders. I’m far too lazy…er… efficient and just send out the questions in bulk.
hahaha! credits to you for bringing Batman in in that one post… we’ve taken this story into some incredible places!
your kid is a gem. Getting your Telluria AND Joon, and being your comic book encyclopedia. A good writer needs great research 
Hello @voidstrike! Please do contribute when you have time.
Also, I didn’t write for almost two years. Then I decided to join a writing challenge recently … and committed myself to 20k in four months. It’s a wonder what a deadline will do. All of a sudden I had things to say. Are you writing anything in particular?
It’s not cheating! Just write. Even if it doesn’t make sense. Because that little bit of genius could come in handy one day. Sometimes I don’t have my laptop, and I’ll type a chapter on my cell phone … in an email draft … and it’s painfully slow, but at least my ideas are somewhere.
i think I speak for everyone when I say, your participation would be very welcome @voidstrike!