We are looking for fellow degenerates, pervs, funny chatty types of any and all levels and stages of development. We aim to have fun socially, in a not at all PG way. A lot of beginners and intermediate players already sharing laughs and hard to believe stories. If you you are bored with a lack of chat, find yourself hitting delete-delete-delete so as to not offend the delicate flowers in your alliance who never chat, or just wanna have fun, we could be your match. Must be active, use your flags, and know how the chat function works. Mention me, and get a slightly used Shake Weight to help keep those forearms supple. We have plenty of room, and we are on a mission to prove that fun and success are not separate goals. We offer no safe zones or guarantees of being top 100, but you could log off every night laughing, shaking your head, or thoroughly disgusted. Serious when we are not being serious. Hot chicks and rich dudes to the front of the line.
So then the doctor says, "If you are signing the forms with my thermometer, where the heck is my pen? "
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
Not bad, not bad at all 
Never been in a clan before. You take newbs?
They are mostly all new here, so all are welcome. Got plenty of room and and no pressure as long as you use up your flags and chat. 
Well, war is over, and we are on the lookout for more active, chatty nuts to keep things fun here. Dirty Pirate Hookers: fun for the whole dysfunctional family! All stages of development welcome. Just use your flags and have some personality.
We still have 3 openings, beginners to awesomeness welcome! I am tired of being the big guy, come on in and join a fun group of delinquents. We are improving at an incredible rate, and you can help. be yourself, be chatty and fun, andl let’s grow this team of misfits together. If you know how to use flags, like teaching beginners and having a bunch of laughs, join the ship of fools. We have all had our shots.
We currently have 2 openings that need to be filled. Wait, that came out wrong. Or did it? Taking on 7 and 8 titans, we could use a couple of hot seamen or seawomen to make us even better. Weekly trips to the free clinic and pegleg poledancing! Be active, chatty and no thin skindrome, please.
1 spot open, kids! Help us break the 100k alliance power barrier, or be a newbie with personality. Just please, please don’t make me go to AR and battle for space against morons who think that poignant comments like, “Hey so-and-so” and “lol” make for a fun recruiting experience. If I had a button to blow up every idiot that pollutes AR with mindless chit chat, there would be stupid shrapnel everywhere…oh, wait. I need to sound positive and fun. That’s right. Please join DPH in time for our all-male wet tee shirt contest, and the next war. 2 for the price of both rum shooters every night, comedy is free. 21 an older, definitely.
Are there any spots left?? can i join??
We have 1, or more spots left. Fighting a rare 8* now, but not looking for mercs. Loyal pirates only! Apply in game or inquire here, will kick dead weight for the worthy.
Still looking for 1-4 intermediate or better players, just bug me here, and we can make room. Not too serious, not too lax, and lots of fun chat. Adults only, active only, and let’s have fun.
We are losing some casual pirates today, looking for active, loyal, twisted sea-worthy boys and girls for shenanigans on the high seas. Contact me here, or apply when the openings are ready. Chatty, no drama, 8* titans, Intermediate or better, please
you are cheerful guy ))) 
Thanks, always hopeful to find that next family member
Exciting news! We now have a sister alliance, Dirty Pirate Strippers!!! Perfect for the casual player, or grower. Still have to be twisted in the head, though. DPH is for the active, intermediate or better derelict. And both have openings that need filling! Wink wink, nudge nudge. You can join DPS without an invite, DPH is snooty and elitist. Sort of. Come on down, and see why people cross the street unnecessarily when they see us coming!
The world needs more hookers. Come fill our holes
DPH & DPS won their respective wars, and spots have filled quicker than we could have anticipated. Don’t wait too long, else ye be condemned to your boring alliance, aaaaarrgh. We put the jolly in jolly roger.
2 spots left with the Hookers. Come grow with us.